I felt a hole in-between my chest. An anchor clinging where it found spaces and gravity pulled me closer to earth. I saw my back arc south and my hands dangle in mid-air. My face grew numb, my eyes almost kissed my cheeks, as I couldn’t imagine ejecting myself from this state of helplessness. My mind was filled with dust, giving off sounds from clanging cymbals and broken furniture. The walls around this room were turning grey and the paint began to peel. I couldn’t save the pictures of laughter, it was all melting, getting swept to a pitless drain. I walked to view the reflection in the mirror and I saw an image that was drained from turmoil. I have had enough. My feet were now clenched to the soil, grounded to the very thing that crushed me. My face was pale, dry, and the skin had begun shedding more than usual. My blood pierced through the layers and hit the soil. I was meant to be the offering. To the gods of change. That my blood would maybe yield another fruit. That my sacrifice would birth another woman. Fragile like glass, my heart threaded this earth. A vibration stronger than an earthquake. I opened my mouth slightly, to speak to the demons within, peace be still.
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